Patti LuPone Plays Bitch On Slow News Day

The divine, remarkable, supremely talented, beautiful, gorgeous, unbelievably amazing Patti Ann LuPone will be on Ugly Betty this coming Thursday, March 22nd. She'll apparently be playing a woman with a diva complex who has a cat with a diva complex.
No, she's not starring as herself. Don't you people know that Patti is too busy for a cat?
Annnnd that would be why I started this off with all of those flowery descriptions.
I love you, Patti LuPone. Please do not kill me with your laser eyes.